Weight Loss, Self Image, and Jealousy

I didn't like how I looked. However, I wasn't doing enough to change it. Yeah, I dieted for my brother's wedding, but I never committed to making a true lifestyle change.

When Mark and I moved in together, I decided to make that happen. It wasn't just for me, it was also for him and for the girls. I wanted us to eat healthy. I wanted to commit to being more active.

I have been successful on both  counts. I have lost and kept off weight. I have gone down 2 pant sizes at my favorite store. While I have a long way to go to reach my goal, I see the progress.

That alone keeps me happy most of the time, but then there are the moments where it is just not enough.

It is the moments where I see my self in unflattering light at the hair salon next to my skinny  stylist.

It is the moments where the new pants are still a little snug.

It is in the moments where I do not like how any of my shirts fit.

It is in the moments where I can't find a swim suit that is flattering.

Those are the days I am just not feeling it. I don't feel attractive. I feel like I am not doing enough. I feel defeated. I am jealous of those who are dedicated enough to make the time to workout more. I am jealous of the people who don't have to worry about their work pants working with whatever shirt they decide to wear that day.

Instead of it pushing me to work harder, I just get stuck in a rut. It sucks, and I need to find a way to turn my attitude around.


bloominoctober said…
I want you to know that I'm super-proud of all you've accomplished. And I know there's far more success to come. I know that when you set your mind to something, you do whatever it takes to get there.

I also want you to know that you are incredibly beautiful. There's not a day that passes where I'm not in awe of you. You make me feel like the luckiest man alive, and I am so proud to have you on my arm.
Laura Strong said…

Do you follow this blog...if you, you should. She's a hoot!!

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