Showing posts from August 1, 2011

It isn't fair

Five weeks before I turned 31, I lost my mom. One week after I turned 32, I lost my dad.

He went into the hospital with something routine for stroke patients. They were saying he would be going home soon. Then the muscle relaxers caused him to aspirate, and he ended up with fluid in his lungs. He wasn't strong enough to fight the infection. He chose to not be on machines and to go peacefully. Thursday we signed the DNR comfort care order. Friday night we were at Hospice. Sunday afternoon he was gone.

Tell me how this is fair?

My year of "firsts" was finally over. Over the past 7 months was starting to feel less numb. Yes that meant getting hurt, feeling disappointment and other bad emotions too, but at least I was feeling them again. Now we start the cycle all over again.

Last time, I watched a parent die in an instant as a barn crashed into her CRV. This time it was different. Dad was responsive up until the last few hours, and was able to tell us exactly what he wanted…