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Showing posts from August 25, 2011

When I Close My Eyes

It is another stormy night...and I wasn't really anxious until I lost power. It is obviously back on now, but it means another night without sleep. 
Sleep is hard for me to come by these days. I was already a chronic insomniac, but now it is worse. I'm anxious again like I was after the tornado. I have so many things on my mind, and I just can't get it to shut off. My stupid shoulder doesn't help matters. It hurts so bad at night that I just can't get comfortable.
On the nights I do fall asleep, I pray that I stay asleep. I'm a light sleeper.  Plus there are the nightmares. After the tornado and losing Mom, the really bad ones started. Some were about the tornado and being in that car that night. Soon though they became different. Namely, every time I closed my eyes I had a front row seat to watching the people I care most about die. 
Time passed, and the nightmares became less frequent. Then the day before my birthday, Dad went into critical care. The nightmares …