Setting Expectations


It is easy to forget to take care of *you.*

I take on too much at work, and sometimes that means others do not learn how to handle situations on their own. I need to step back and allow that learning to happen.

It is okay for me to want to talk to the girls about this summer:
- Yes Kidrite is mostly targeted for little kids, but you will have to go there two or three days a week. Going to the gym and taking care of my body is important to me.
- Last summer we tried to enforce  chores. They didn't take it seriously. This summer they aren't getting a choice. I can't do it all on my own with their dad working second shift, and while going to school. They need to understand this. It isn't just me being mean or lazy. It is just how things work.

It is okay for me to want a dedicated office space.

When we moved into the house, Mark had a job that allowed him to work from home one day a week. I gave him free reign of the loft as an office. He no longer can work from home. Last year, I went back to school. I've been working from our couch with a computer stand, a T.V. tray table I made, and a small ottoman as my workspace. It has been sufficient; however, I know there are bigger projects and much more research in my near future. I want to reclaim the office space as my own.

Now this request has been met with zero resistance. It is actually openly accepted. Where it will get complicated is to turn that loft into what I want, we have to follow through on getting boards for the attic and finally putting things away. I need to actually stick to my guns and make sure we actually make this happen. It will mean their girls can't leave their laundry in the desk chair for days on end (such as it is as I type this).

I'm not unhappy with my job, but I shouldn't feel bad for planning for my future.

It is okay for me to take time aside to work on my CV and my LinkedIn Profile even if I'm not aggressively looking for a shiney new job. Really there isn't even a realistic shiney new job on my radar (unrealistically: there is a perfect job posted, but it is in Columbus, Ohio. There is a laundry list of reasons why it would be perfect. The why it won't work list is much shorter, but the reasons on that list are deal breakers ). It may be months (or longer) until I find something I want to pursue, but I want to be ready when that day comes.

Bottom line:

Expectations aren't a bad thing. They keep us healthy, sane and somewhat on top of what is going on in our lives. Sometimes I lose sight of where I am going, and I need to refocus and set new expectations.

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