"My little brother got his arm stuck in the microwave. So my mom had to take him to the hospital. My grandma dropped acid this morning, and she freaked out. She hijacked a busload of penguins. So it's sort of a family crisis. Bye!"

I love a good party. However, there are some deal breakers. I can handle bad music, movies and other minor indiscretions. There are things that remind me of that scene in "Better Off Dead" where Lane is trying to get rid of the stalker paperboy. I'll come up with just about anything to get out of there.


They run out of your beverage of choice..early
This one is pretty obvious...


The high school drama starts
I'm not sure why adults must revert back to being sixteen again. It wasn't flattering when we were teenagers. It certainly isn't attractive now. When the drama hits it usually a good idea to duck out. If you can't leave, try to stay clear of the drama as much as possible. If you eventually find yourself being put in to the drama, pretend to sleep or just ignore it.


They break out the board games
I know many fair minded people love games, but I hate them. Actually, I was bored the other night and one girl's solution was to ask our host if he had any board games. I really did appreciate the gesture, but I just wasn't interested. I'm not sure why I hate board games and bowling with such vigor, but I do.


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